The story we present to you today is about one such counseling psychologist and her journey of being a counselor, Ms. Gargi Vishnoi. Gargi, 28, has been a counseling psychologist for the past four years, and she has been doing a fantastic job in helping people overcome their mental health crises.
Moving along in this path of life, hurdles are something we are bound to come across. Sometimes significant, sometimes slight, the hurdles never stop appearing. Not ever heard is the same. Some have the most formidable walls that would take your everything to break through it. While some are so tall that if one trips over it, they might fall way down. Similarly, not every hurdle of life is physical. Some hurdles seem social, some are ethical, and some are psychological.
Every hurdle one ever comes across has an impact on the psychological or mental well-being of that person. When things are hard on you, you run out of luck, overexert yourself, and sometimes even after doing the absolute best, you might fail.
But then, it’s just a phase as life is like a flowing river and not a lake. It keeps moving ahead. Similarly, the downtimes don’t define what you are. It’s just a phase from which you are bound to move out. Whenever you face any mental health crisis, it is essential to seek help, but then people don’t! The reason for this hesitation is the misconception and the fear of labeling as ‘Crazy.’ ‘What am I crazy, that I need a counselor?’
Is what one typically thinks. The fear of being labeled as crazy is something so severe that it restrains one from seeking help. However, one must understand, it is entirely ok to seek help. What you are going through is just a phase, and you will eventually move out of it even faster with a professional at aid.
“I think it’s essential to take the stigma away from mental health… My brain and my heart are critical to me. I don’t know why I wouldn’t seek help to have those things be as healthy as my teeth?”
-Kerry Washington
Mental health is a severe issue of the current times. Everyone should be well aware of psychological well-being and how to sustain it in mental health and psychology, which is more qualified to speak of it than a psychologist.
Gargi Vishnoi – Her Story
Being a counseling psychologist Gargi Vishnoi strives to spread awareness about mental health. She owns an Instagram account called ‘@ihealgood,’ where she strives to reach people and work for the awareness of psychology. Let’s take a closer look!
The Advent of @Ihealgood:
How did the idea sprout into Gargi’s mind?
Gargi Vishnoi – So, the idea behind this came from classic stereotypes about psychology. In my career, I came across many people who used to tell me that they didn’t think of reaching out for help because of the stigmas and the negative views about mental health. Most of them were worried about how society would perceive them if they visited a counselor.
So, given a thought, I felt that to get rid of a stigma is to talk about it, and if I speak more about it, it will become a common thing. It will be easier for people to normalize it when they know that they are not alone. Thus, it will make things easier for people, and they’ll be able to seek help.
One can see over social media that the more people can relate to something, for instance, depressive symptoms, the more it becomes normal as people come to know that they are not alone. So the core idea behind it was this, to spread awareness. It’s been more than a year now, and I feel that the step that I took is taking flight.
What’s in the name:
Every name has a tale to tell. Let’s see what it is for @ihealgood!
Gargi Vishnoi – The name, basically the thought behind this name, was healing. Healing has to be a part of a person’s journey. Mental health is all about growing and healing from the hardships of your life, a trauma you have faced, or the difficult times you have been through.
Healing is growing through all these challenging times. Mental well-being doesn’t simply mean the absence of disease. It is also about feeling or being at your best. So the word heal came from this intention that I wanted to make people feel healed.
And Ihealgood, it was just that it rhymed pretty well with I heal good, I feel good, and that is another factor that contributed to deciding the name for my Instagram handle, and it could make sense to the people I heal good, I feel good. Thus, I came up with the name ‘@ihealgood.’
When research and observation come together:
You cannot simply write if you know nothing. Let’s see how it is done when coming up with a post!
Gargi Vishnoi – Being a practicing counseling psychologist, I regularly take clients. During the sessions, I note down the key concern areas of my clients whenever I see that there is a recurring pattern in everybody’s concern, which makes me believe that It might be a common problem amongst the masses.
The more people I come across, the more themes I decide upon. The most prevalent area I work upon is relationships because that is one of the most focused people I talk to. So I came up with posts that could make people more aware of the red flags in a relationship, how to set boundaries in relationships, signs of a healthy relationship, etc.
Apart from that, research is the other aspect from which I come up with different topics. There was a post about ‘gaslighting.’ Not many people knew what gaslighting is, but they had experienced it in their lives, with their partners or parents, etc. But when they came across this post, many responded that they had been through this or going through this. So research is something that plays a crucial part while creating a post. A lot of research goes into every post I create.
Experience counts:
Wisdom comes from the most painful lessons.
Gargi Vishnoi – Well, each one of us has our struggles in life. As for me, being a psychologist was never a part of my plan. I always dreamt of serving the Indian Air Force. I tried for four years to get into it, but sometimes, I couldn’t qualify for the interview, while other times, I couldn’t qualify for the final merit list. In my final year, I had passed everything I was selected for, but it was just that I couldn’t get in just because the seats were limited.
So, during those years, I had it rough, but this subject helped. I understood my motivation, my feelings, how and why I was feeling it that way. I was experiencing some depressive symptoms back then. Also, I had a relationship with anxiety for quite a long time. But during those times, the subject knowledge came in handy.
So that is when I thought that if this subject knowledge could help me, it would be helpful for others. So that’s when I decided to do my master’s in this subject and came into this field. Psychology has helped me be more relatable and empathetic, and I’ve gained a more emotional quotient.
Make Light of Mental Health:
Mental health is often overlooked. In what ways does it bother a counselor?
Gargi Vishnoi – Yes, it does bother me a lot because I come across many people who suffer from mental health crises but never accept them. The lack of acceptance, labeling, etc., is a deterrent in making people choose health. Lack of awareness again is also a vital aspect in sustaining these stigmas and labels in society. Also, I feel that psychology as a subject should be introduced to kids in the school itself.
Not the theories or anything but even the basic life skills if taught in schools, such as being stress-free, managing your thoughts, living free from anxiety, etc. It would make a significant impact on the lives of those kids. Because these days, even school-going kids are prone to stress and anxiety. I also feel that the media has been the culprit in all this stigmatization process.
The media representation of mental illness is very skewed. They portray a very extreme image of mental illness which is not appropriate. 70% of the mental illnesses are neurotic, which includes anxiety, depression, and mood disorders. Only a small percentage of mental illnesses are psychotic, but unfortunately, the minority is highlighted. Thus, people don’t want to be looked at like that. A person with anxiety would need a simple medication but won’t approach thinking that I might be considered crazy.
Seeking out is Speaking out:
When going through a mental health crisis, what should one do?
Gargi Vishnoi – The most important thing one should do at such times is to speak up! One should speak to someone, a professional instead. Trying to figure out what is happening via googling the symptoms is the worst mistake because it will only worsen the case, as Google would provide you with extreme answers that could further put you more under stress.
You can research things, but I would say that fixing a single appointment with a psychologist or psychiatrist would give you a clearer perspective. Even if you don’t wish to continue it for the long term, you will at least know what is going on within if it requires medication, can be self-regulated or not, etc. One should reflect on it as ‘How it is affecting my life?’ ‘Is it temporary, or has it been affecting my life for long?’ Because it becomes a problem when it starts affecting our lives.
Being aware of our surroundings:
How can one recognize if someone around them is going through mental health crisis:
Gargi Vishnoi – The signs will be visible when someone is going through a mental health crisis. A significant change in moods, behavior, emotions, etc. It could be a sign. For instance, someone with a calm persona will suddenly seem agitated. Or someone full of energy will suddenly seem dull or low on motivation, etc. Changes in sleep patterns, appetite, the way they talk, etc. Look for persistent changes.
Life is a Balancing Act:
The posts on ihealgood seem to have a perfect balance. Let’s look more into it!
Gargi Vishnoi – Balance is something very much necessary in life. You can be just oblivious to reality. You can look at everything from a therapeutic perspective. Thus, some posts include well-researched topics, while some are motivational phrases that I feel someone might need. However, some art of research is included in it.
Key to a Happy Life:
Some essential yet crucial factors for a happy and content life!
- Acknowledging that problems are a part of life, they don’t go away. You learn how to deal with them. Accepting the fact that things cannot always be rosy. Even the roses have thorns in them.
- It is ok to grieve about problems. Take your time, feel the emotions, process them, make sure that you are coping with them is healthy. I strongly suggest that everyone should have a place to vent. May it be a diary, a voice note, a note on a notepad, or any creative outlet.
- Once things are on paper, you will get a clearer perspective. As when emotions occupy our mind, our thinking ability goes down. Cataloging your thoughts, knowing and managing them is very important.
- Not everything is Catastrophic. One should not take everything seriously.
- Therapy is the right way to live life. I have my therapist as well because despite being a counselor myself, I am a human first, and I go through the same problems which any other would face.
- One should always have something they are passionate about. A hobby or something that keeps them going so that the majority of the time of their life doesn’t go into simply wallowing.
An Insight into Gargi’s life:
Apart from counseling, what are all hobbies Gargi possesses?
Gargi Vishnoi – I like to paint a lot. I often take time for painting, and I enjoy it a lot. When things were not going well during my downtime, I used to take some time out and bring a canvas in and paint my heart out. It would give me a feeling of accomplishment. Besides, what creativity does to you is that it releases ‘dopamine,’ a happy hormone, making you feel good. Other than that, I love to exercise, spend a lot of time in nature as well. Evolutionary-wise, humans are wired to feel good being in nature.
The effects of Pandemic:
Let’s see how the pandemic time has been for Gargi, both as a person and counseling psychologist.
Gargi Vishnoi – Profession-wise, it was as busy as a bee. During those times, people felt anxious, lonely, depressed as the times were uncertain, and being a mental health professional increased the workload. But it also provided me insight into how people view ample time on their hands since every person is a research project and how people differ in dealing with adversities. It was both an exciting and a difficult time as it would also take a toll on me. It wore me out.
As an individual, being bored is never in my dictionary. I always find something or the other to do. I learned how to bake, conducted a few workshops and webinars, and worked on a bit of the handbook I was working on earlier. I also took up a lot of online psychology courses. I came closer to myself.
The lockdown wasn’t hard on me. I was blessed to be in this secure atmosphere. Also, covid did affect my family, but rather than being emotionally strained. We focused on the protocols which were to be followed. Besides, knowing that it is a global pandemic must make it easy because it gets generalized, and we are all in it together.
Stepping into the shoes of @ihealgood:
Knowing that our work has been able to help someone out is a great feeling. Let’s hear it from Gargi.
Gargi Vishnoi – There are so many of them I would like to mention. There was one instance when a specific person was facing anxiety since it was the board exams. This person had failed for two years and was suffering from depressive symptoms and suicidal thoughts used to visit me regarding this issue.
After some time, I didn’t hear from her, and one fine day her mother called me crying, saying that ‘I’m indebted to you for bringing a positive change in my daughter’s life. That day, the whole family spoke to me, telling me how counseling has done wonders for their family. It was a great experience!
Seeing my clients coping up well with life and living a healthy life is an achievement for me!
Then Vs. Now:
Gargi’s life before and after @ihealgood came into being:
Gargi Vishnoi – Before ihealgood, I would say that I was not as much of an effective professional as I am now, and also, the empathetic part of me has developed a lot. Having ‘Ihealgood’ is very rewarding. I was seeing that people can relate to the stuff I’ve been posting. There was one incident where someone recognized me at the Delhi airport and told me how they related with the gaslighting post. It’s a great feeling! I have so much gratitude towards ihealgood.
Word of Wisdom:
I would like to say that if things are hard on you right now, you have it rough to find somebody and talk to them. You are not alone. A lot of people are going through a lot right now. Knowing that you have people around you who would listen to you will make you feel better. No trauma is too minor, and no trauma is too significant!
“Mental health problems don’t define who you are. They are something you experience. You walk in the rain, and you feel the rain, but, importantly,
YOU ARE NOT THE RAIN.”
— Matt Haig
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